Mental Health Isn’t Always Pretty, and I Wish We Talked About That More 💜

The messy, uncomfortable side of mental health that doesn’t fit into a cute Instagram quote.

Can we talk about something?

I love that mental health awareness has become more mainstream.

We share self-care reminders, inspirational quotes, cute little affirmations, and posts reminding people to take care of themselves.

Heck, I create some of those things myself. 😂

But there’s something I think we forget to talk about.

Mental health isn’t always pretty.

Sometimes it’s crying after a stressful day at work because you’ve been holding everything in.

Sometimes it’s replaying a tiny mistake over and over until you’ve convinced yourself you’re terrible at everything.

Sometimes it’s being completely exhausted but having a brain that refuses to shut up.

And sometimes it’s smiling, laughing, and acting perfectly fine while internally you’re struggling to keep it together.

I’ve been there.

You Can Look Fine and Still Be Struggling

This is probably one of the biggest things I wish more people understood.

Just because someone shows up to work, smiles at customers, and gets through their responsibilities doesn’t mean they’re doing okay mentally.

As someone who struggles with anxiety and overthinking, I know how exhausting it can be to appear completely fine.

I can be having a perfectly normal conversation while my brain is worrying about ten other things.

Did I say something wrong?

Are they upset with me?

Did I make a mistake earlier?

It’s like having 50 browser tabs open in my head, and at least three of them are playing music.

And I can’t figure out which ones. 🙃

Knowing Coping Skills Doesn’t Mean You’re Always Okay

Here’s something I’ve learned while creating mental wellness resources.

You can know all the self-care advice in the world and still struggle to follow it yourself.

I write about boundaries, anxiety, self-compassion, and slowing down.

And yet, sometimes I’m the person who needs those reminders the most.

I know I should take breaks.

I know I shouldn’t overthink every little mistake.

I know that having a bad day doesn’t mean I’m failing at life.

But knowing something and actually believing it when you’re overwhelmed are two very different things.

I’m still learning, too.

And I think that’s okay.

Mental Illness Is More Than a Diagnosis

Something else I wish we talked about more is the stigma surrounding mental illness.

Especially the conditions people still feel uncomfortable discussing.

A diagnosis doesn’t tell you everything about a person.

Someone can struggle with their mental health and still be creative, funny, hardworking, compassionate, and full of dreams.

Mental health challenges are part of someone’s story, but they aren’t the entire story.

I’m more than my anxious thoughts.

I’m an artist. A writer. A pet mom. A creative person with way too many ideas and probably not enough hours in the day.

And yes, I’m also someone who struggles.

Both things can be true.

Sometimes We Don’t Need Another Inspirational Quote

Don’t get me wrong. I love a good motivational reminder.

But sometimes, when I’m overwhelmed, the last thing I need is someone telling me to think positively.

Sometimes I just need someone to listen.

To understand that I’m having a hard day without trying to immediately fix everything.

Sometimes I need to rest without feeling guilty.

And sometimes my biggest accomplishment is simply making it through the day.

Not every day is going to be productive, inspiring, or filled with personal growth.

Some days are just hard.

And a hard day doesn’t erase all the progress you’ve made.

I’m Still Figuring It Out, Too

I don’t have all the answers.

Despite writing about mental wellness and creating self-care tools, I’m still working through my own struggles.

I still overthink.

I still put too much pressure on myself.

I still have moments when I feel overwhelmed by things that other people might not even notice.

But I’m learning that taking care of my mental health isn’t about becoming someone who never struggles.

It’s about learning how to support myself when I do.

And maybe that’s one of the biggest mental health truths we need to talk about.

You don’t have to be completely healed, perfectly happy, or have everything figured out to deserve kindness and understanding.

Especially from yourself.

Just a 30-something doing her best-ish, one messy day at a time. 💜

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A little question for you: What’s one thing you wish more people understood about mental health?

I’d genuinely love to hear your perspective.

This is a shorter, personal reflection based on my original article, Mental Health Truths We Need to Talk About, on The Abby Juli Journal. The full article explores 14 mental health truths, including anxiety, medication, therapy, self-care, and the stigma surrounding mental illness.

These are my personal reflections, not professional mental health advice.