Maybe Finding Myself Means Going Back to Who I Used to Be 💜

Sometimes healing isn’t about becoming someone new. Sometimes it’s about remembering who you were before life got so overwhelming.

I’ve been thinking about something lately.

What if finding yourself isn’t always about moving forward?

What if sometimes it’s about going back?

Back to the things you used to love.

The hobbies that made you happy.

The little pieces of yourself that somehow got lost between anxiety, responsibilities, and trying to figure out adulthood.

Because honestly? I think I’ve lost touch with parts of myself along the way.

Not completely. But enough to notice.

Somewhere Along the Way, I Forgot to Just Create

I’ve always loved being creative.

Photography, drawing, digital art, writing… those things have always been part of who I am.

But somewhere between working, managing my mental health, building my websites, and trying to make something of myself, creativity started feeling like another responsibility.

Another project to finish.

Another thing to post.

Another thing that needed to have a purpose.

And I started forgetting why I loved creating in the first place.

Because sometimes I just want to make something without worrying whether anyone else will like it.

Wild concept, right? 😂

Finding Little Pieces of Myself Again

Recently, I started looking through some of my old photographs.

Sunsets. Nature. Little details I had captured over the years.

Nothing particularly fancy.

Just moments that made me stop and appreciate something beautiful.

I started turning those photographs into digital collages.

No big plan.

No worrying about likes, followers, or whether they would make a good product.

Just me, my photos, and a little creativity.

And something about it felt comforting.

I started adding little reflections to them. Thoughts about life, anxiety, healing, and everything I’ve been trying to understand about myself.

Before I knew it, those collages became little visual journal entries.

And I realized something.

I wasn’t just creating art. I was reconnecting with myself.

The girl who loved wandering around with a camera.

The girl who noticed beauty in ordinary things.

The girl who created because it made her happy, not because she needed to accomplish something.

She’s still here.

I just needed to make room for her again.

Maybe We Don’t Have to Reinvent Ourselves

I think there’s so much pressure in adulthood to constantly improve.

Find your purpose.

Build a career.

Become the best version of yourself.

And while personal growth is important, sometimes I wonder if we’re so focused on becoming someone better that we forget to appreciate who we already are.

I’m 30, and I’m still figuring out what I want my life to look like.

But I’m learning that I don’t need to completely reinvent myself to move forward.

Sometimes I just need to remember what makes me feel like me.

And for me, that’s creating.

Not for money.

Not for social media.

Not to prove anything.

Just because I love it.

Maybe healing isn’t always about finding a new version of yourself. Maybe sometimes it’s about finding your way back to the parts of you that never really left.

Still growing. Still creating. Still figuring it out.

Just a 30-something doing her best-ish. 💜

---

A little question for you: Is there a hobby or something you loved when you were younger that you’ve recently started reconnecting with?

This reflection is adapted from my original article, Sometimes Finding Yourself Means Going Back to the Beginning, published on AbbyJuli Diaries. You can also explore more of my writing, photography, and creative wellness resources at AbbyJuli.com.